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Asked: Nov 19 '13 at 20:37

Seen: 8,093 times

Last updated: Dec 22 '13 at 16:25


Your IQ by-laws say this: "Treat others with the same respect that you'd want them to show you. Please be tolerant of others who may not know everything you know.

Why are you allowing this person to make my life Hell on IQ? This person is not being either tolerant or respectful. Why has this person been allowed to make nasty comment after comment to many people, especially me, and has not been sanctioned???

I feel like leaving IQ. I nearly have already. I cannot take these comments any longer.


asked Nov 19 '13 at 20:37

Jaianniah's gravatar image


edited Nov 19 '13 at 20:39

@Jaianniah Please can you provide the link to the comment or comments that are motivating you to ask this question?

(Nov 20 '13 at 15:16) Simon Templeton ♦♦

@Simon: It is this user: It's not difficult to find some of the relevant comments, especially on Jai's "Will writing my book" post.

(Nov 21 '13 at 01:26) Vesuvius

You are a little late to the party @Vesuvius. Too bad you weren't subscribed to all answers. I also told Simon he should look at my recent history. The hub page link was not posted till after Wade wrote his answer. I was actually trying to help her. No one else seems to care. Then I deleted my answer for one simple reason - "This is ridiculous & I cannot believe I stooped to their level." Simon & anyone subscribed has a copy of the answer I deleted.

(Nov 21 '13 at 01:37) ele

@ele did you learn a lesson from this? you did not answer me. smile.

(Nov 21 '13 at 19:59) whitetiger

Actually I did answer your question @white tiger A reasonable person would look for a reply where they asked the question. I suggest you look there for my answer. You didn't forget where you asked the question did you? Don't bother responding cause banned members do not get mail from IQ & doubt if anyone else would care .

(Nov 21 '13 at 20:49) ele

@ele I got no reply from you. more then once and when you have reply you said it was only in my head. was it really only in my head? are you perfect? did you really understood? are you not doing the same as @jai then why try to point finger at her or to look for saw dust in her eyes with out removing the beam in your own eye. she might not be perfect but at least she is trying to correct her self and told about some error she did. probably that some other error she did not see yet. but @ele you are doing the same thing as her did you say that you made some error?

(Nov 21 '13 at 22:23) whitetiger

or did you say it is only in your head your own little scenario. well you are now seeing your own little scenario that often you do not want to see. take this opportunity to improve yourself and accept your fault so that you can correct them. ignore paint does not serve you to much does it? you might not consider me as a reasonable person. is it my problem or my responsibility? or is it your choice and your responsibility? no I did not forget any thing but did you? You would prefer that I did not respond.

(Nov 21 '13 at 22:27) whitetiger

and yes I think that iq member care about each other and are able to respect and understand each other. but you see it as to start from the inside going out. from the out going in it does not work the current situation should prove this to you.

(Nov 21 '13 at 22:33) whitetiger

Great timing @white tiger I answered your question in a timely fashion. I only posted the answer you commented on yesterday. I responded to your comment within a couple hrs. It was one of my last acts on IQ. The comment was prob flagged. As I explained, I do not receive mail from IQ now. Now I feel funny saying hi to banned members when I post on their threads. lol! Prior to this, I only received mail when another member comments directly under my answer. I'm sorry if I missed another question.

(Nov 21 '13 at 22:43) ele

@ele well if you have respond the last 2 days I have receive nothing. and where I posted I did not see a response from you either. I have said to you that you liked to make example of other and did not like to be a example. you probably do not like to be the example that you are today. even @Dollar Bill as told you to take your medication. well at least I have seen on your post that you agree that you are on the same level as @jai. it is a good start being on the same level you should be able to understand each other with out pointing finger and find flaws to make discord and praise yourself.

(Nov 21 '13 at 23:00) whitetiger

I'm sitting here reading all of this, awestruck.

For starters, the situation is ridiculous.

Furthermore, we're all adults here. Adults, on the internet.

Then you start to actually read the conversations and the back-and-forths... People like yourself, WT, the quote you reference suggesting people "take their medication", and other inappropriate commentary from just about every member involved.

Frankly, I feel MANY people are out of line here, including the moderators for not squashing this nonsense to begin with. Suspending ele is a joke considering other's behavior has rivaled it~

(Nov 21 '13 at 23:15) Snow

But more importantly.. It's absolutely absurd that this discussion is even happening in the first place.

This situation should have been a simple open/close from the beginning, and just about every single involvement since has reflected poorly on the participants.

Somehow I doubt (hope not? that would be sad) you're going to suspend numerous long-standing members over this absolutely pointless nonsense, so why not tell everyone to shut the hell up, go for a walk, take a breather, and get their heads back on straight...

(Nov 21 '13 at 23:15) Snow

This has turned into some stupid contest of who is saying the worse things or being more unacceptable. Everyone here is out of line and we should all be ashamed for allowing this situation to unfold to this degree in the first place, and for every moment we allow it to continue instead of just letting it go and forgetting about it.

I'm one of the most detached people I know and I feel everyone here needs a severe reality check.

(Nov 21 '13 at 23:17) Snow

@white tiger you said "even @Dollar Bill as told you to take your medication." I assume you read the same comment I did. When I read what Bill wrote it seemed to me, DB was accusing both you and Jai of saying I was mentally ill and in need of medication. Is Bill telling the truth? I didn't see any comments by your or Jai saying anything like this. Did you or Jai say I was off my meds? I could have missed it or it was deleted. Would you care to explain?

"Ha Ha @ele. White Tiger and Jai are right about you. You must be off your medication. Bye Bye." (Nov 13 at 20:39)Dollar Bill

(Nov 22 '13 at 00:14) ele

@white tiger The reason you did not receive an email notification is because you made your comment under my answer. You only receive email notifications on IQ if someone responds directly under your answer or question. I did NOT realize you did not know this. It's dif at Meta if you subscribe to everything. Reasonable was not meant to be an insult - I meant it was logical to assume this would be where one would look for a response from a person you poised a question to. Look at my answer to this question & click on the 2nd to the last link I posted.

(Nov 22 '13 at 00:46) ele

@ele no db was saying that wee are telling you the truth and are right about you. you must be off your medication. bye bye. and the ha ha at the beginning he was finding that funny.

(Nov 22 '13 at 00:53) whitetiger

@Simon Templeton Suspending ele does seem too harsh. I've seen many worse incidents than this. Catherine

(Nov 22 '13 at 16:09) Kate

@whitetiger Thank you for your interpretation. I do understand the words "HA Ha" & "Bye Bye" . As for the rest, I disagree. 3 of the highest karma members say that about another member & it's ok - I think not. I flagged your previous comment 21 hours ago; but no one seems to care. I have no idea in what world its ok to say to anyone "take your meds" or "you must be off your meds" or to insult another member by suggesting they must have a mental illness. Have I ever said I had a mental illness? No, I have not. It 's offensive to say crap no matter the context; but perfectly

(Nov 22 '13 at 22:29) ele

... acceptable to say what these 3 members did? @Simon whitetiger deserves a warning. I understand Meta rules are dif than IQ; but it appears these words may have been said on IQ considering the date of Bills original comment - Nov 13th. Thank you.

(Nov 22 '13 at 22:38) ele

@ele are you on medication? or said to @dollar bill that you are? why should I have a warning for talking with you and telling you the truth? why are you trying to find flaws in other? does it serve you or are you making a example of your self of what not to do? will you put someone on a cross for telling you the truth?

(Nov 23 '13 at 00:01) whitetiger

@Kate There are a number of users from countries or continents other than North America who belong to Meta. They don't seem to be active on any of the questions posted here. It seems you are the lone voice & sole representative of a continent other than North America. Evidently ppl from North America are very opinionated. They like to ask questions & complain. Hopefully the later doesn't rub off on you. Thanks Catherine.

(Nov 26 '13 at 15:31) ele
showing 6 of 21 show all

@ele : I have now reinstated your account on Inward Quest. Your account was suspended, not because of this question posted at the top of this thread on Meta, but because of private messages sent to the moderators using terms which if used by an attorney might indicate a threat of legal proceedings that could involve Inward Quest. As the site owner, I felt the prudent course of action was to temporarily suspend your account and assess the legal risks to the website. I am not going to inflame this situation further by saying what those private messages contained.

@ele, @Jaianniah : Regarding the question that has been asked at the top of this thread, it seems that what we have here is a perception of aggressive behaviour by one member of the site against another, neither of whom was prepared to ignore what the other is saying or doing. I would ask both of you to consider that anyone looking at these interactions on Inward Quest from the outside will be forming their own opinions and those opinions will likely be based (unfairly or not) on the behaviour of those involved rather than the ideas being expressed. I have noticed that readers of this site are generally intelligent insightful people who can make up their own minds about any issue even if one person is choosing to deliberately ignore the comments of another. And it often seems to be the case that the one doing the ignoring can end up with a higher public-perceived level of integrity and trust by choosing not to get involved. As I have said previously on Meta, it takes two people to have an argument.

It is not my place to become involved in the nature of your disagreement. I cannot possibly know the rights and wrongs of the subject matter you are disagreeing about. My concern, as site owner, is about how it reflects on Inward Quest and those who visit the site daily looking for spiritually-based information. With that in mind, I would ask both of you to please consider taking a more positive approach with your interactions with others and choose in future to just ignore any behaviour you do not like. If you really feel the need to express your point of view (perhaps to clear up a factual misunderstanding), it can still be done in a more neutral objective way. I note that there are many on Inward Quest who already impart their strongly-held opinions quite effectively in this dispassionate emotionally-neutral manner.

@Jaianniah : I've seen reference to you describing some of your questions as being "rhetorical" in nature. If that is the case, I would appreciate it if you could please make this clear on any future "rhetorical" questions you ask as I perceive that at least some of the people answering those questions are doing so because they are under the impression that those answers are important to you. The dictionary definition of the word "rhetorical" carries an implication that the answers do not matter. It seems to me that some would not have invested time and effort in writing those answers if they were aware of the "rhetorical" nature of the questions.

I'm sorry if either of you ( @ele, @Jaianniah ) was expecting some kind of definitive conclusion regarding this issue but, as I hope you appreciate, I am not a professional arbitrator or a legal representative. I am hoping that both of you can resolve your differences amicably between yourselves, or else please just completely ignore each other. But I have to point out that if this does not work and the situation on Inward Quest escalates further, I will resort to permanent account suspensions not least to protect the site from becoming embroiled in legal actions.


answered Nov 23 '13 at 03:10

Simon%20Templeton's gravatar image

Simon Templeton ♦♦

I would like to say something to you & Jai & will be back. I did not plan to be on tonight; but when I looked at my email, I thought I best reply before someone else got caught up in this web. Thank you.

(Nov 25 '13 at 03:14) ele

@Simon I understood why you felt it was necessary to suspend my acct. I wish you would have mentioned the real reason in the beginning. I was never upset until Jai & Wade posted their answers & I saw the tags "trolls" & " hazing". I never noticed the tags before. I couldn't believe what I was reading. I have enough legal background to know I did NOT put IQ or myself in legal jeopardy. My attorneys have confirmed this.. I had no idea you would be threatened with legal action. Even though their threats are baseless; I agree it's a nuisance & a headache you do not deserve.

(Nov 26 '13 at 04:48) ele

I'm sorry for the headache this caused. Rhetorical, hypothetical, pure or part fiction. Maybe it matters, maybe it doesn't. Lesson learned, never take anything personal when posting on an internet forum. It doesn't matter if its a spiritual forum or not.

(Nov 26 '13 at 05:02) ele

@Simon I was wondering if you could delete my answer to Jai's question. I hope this will make Jai feel better. I clicked on a hub page link earlier & I believe she made the pages disappear. I would like to make this copy disappear also.

@white tiger is the only person who made a comment. If Simon agrees to delete my answer, would you agree to have your comments deleted @white tiger

Thank you..

(Nov 27 '13 at 05:00) ele


If possible, could this answer be deleted also?

@flowsurfer & Wade posted on it. I can ask flowsurfer if its ok with him . @Wade would it be ok with you if Simon agrees?

@Jai maybe you should ask Simon to delete this question and all the answers. I can't imagine anyone would have an objection to this.

Thank you.

(Nov 27 '13 at 05:02) ele

@ele This means more to me than I could ever express in print. This is love, understanding and compassion. I have been in a depression over this for days. Jai too, her depression not only over that but my depression feeling she ruined IQ for me. Neither of us have been in a good mood in a while, we both have been snippy with each other, we don't fight but would like to get back to happiness. She was pleading with me last night, saying please don't leave IQ over me. She knows when I drop something I don't look back. I had to save her life over this too.

Full permission given Simon to delete.

(Nov 27 '13 at 07:49) Wade Casaldi

@ele Thank you for working to set things right. ele I am so sorry too. Please have a wonderful and peaceful Thanksgiving! (((ele))) :-)

(Nov 27 '13 at 07:55) Wade Casaldi

@ele-Thank you for this. I think all of this nonsense should be deleted. I, Jaianniah, agree, also. Ele, by trying to educate me, which I now understand comes from a good place, unfortunately, you showed any reader just how to go about finding out my real name, DOB, etc. as you said in another posting somehow here- that needs to be deleted, also. I believe that in your desire to help me, you unfortunately have shown other people what to do and how to go about it. That is why I assumed that you Had already gone ahead and done this yourself Blessings, hugs to you!

(Nov 27 '13 at 08:16) Jaianniah

@Wade Yes, I'm sorry too - this has been crazy stupid - just insane. I don't know what happened to me. Having good vibes is important to me as well & my vibes affect "others". I have enough to handle w/o this. Sorry.. @Jai - "educate" - you don't listen. I told you this before & I hinted at it a couple times also. You gave a new member, a complete stranger your BD, place of birth & email address w/o batting an eye. I don't know if your home address can be accessed online. You moved, depends on if you have a landline & whether its a listed no. or not. A pro would not have too much (A)

(Nov 27 '13 at 08:44) ele

(B) trouble locating a SS no. either. I won't say how. Names & address's are worse than a BD tho, as are _ of loved ones. You aren't wealthy & I don't think your credit is too good. I can guarantee you, you don't want anyone stealing your identity. Personal safety would be my main concern till you get rich. There's creeps out there Jai. You'll have to ask Simon if he'll delete this question. You asked it. No I haven't looked you up. I could tell you some of the Q & A's you had personal info; but not all of them. There are numerous postings. You & Wade have a blessed Thanksgiving.

(Nov 27 '13 at 09:00) ele

Yes, I want the question deleted as much as you do @Jai. So you have my permission if @Simon will be so kind. Hugs..

(Nov 27 '13 at 09:01) ele

@Simon I do NOT want you to bend the rules for me, even though my option to delete was taken from me when I was suspended before the hour was up. I had plenty of time after the suspension was removed to request this. I did NOT. After the recent events which occurred on IQ, I think it would be best if my answers remained. Thank you. I also do NOT see where @Jai asked you to delete this question, which indicates to me she doesn't really care.

(Nov 29 '13 at 15:07) ele

@ele Are you actually saying you want to leave all that in that made Jai feel so bad and ruined that she felt suicidal? Jai and I both agreed on it being deleted, now you want to keep it!

Everything is out of context and makes Jai look like some kind of lying, crazy, killer! flowsurfer even noticed that! That makes me mad again!

(Dec 01 '13 at 07:55) Wade Casaldi

@ele- I did not ask for the question to be deleted because I felt that the discussion involved was important to you and the rest of IQ, however antagonistic it may have been. I was trying to show my tolerance for any discussion, however inflammatory it may have been. Please do not try to think for me. Do not assume that I do not care. Rather, I was trying to let things calm down....

(Dec 02 '13 at 00:50) Jaianniah

@ele-...and also, which is entirely off-topic- I have been dreadfully ill. Even today I spent the day at the ER. I had very low blood sugar with my diabetes, and fell unconscious just after they accessed my port. I have no recollection of them pushing dextrose into me. I came out of it after being unconscious, and then sleeping for a while.. This whole uproar could not have come at a worse time for me personally. I have a raging sinus infection, a broken thumb which will not heal, and which finally got casted today. I have a lot on my plate. I did not mean to offend you. ♥

(Dec 02 '13 at 01:00) Jaianniah

"I was trying to show my tolerance for any discussion, however inflammatory it may have been." "I was trying to let things calm down."*

Surely you jest -- your next ? on Meta, Thanksgiving Day & your actions on IQ on that question do not have anything to do with tolerance or "calming things" down.

I did not assume. I said indicated ~ meaning your words & actions led me or any other reasonable person (1)

(Dec 22 '13 at 15:46) ele

(2) to believe 'something' was true . To assume means to think something is true w/o any type of proof or rhyme or reason for doing so .

Your last words on the subject "I think all of this nonsense should be deleted."

I stand corrected ~ you say you care ~ just NOT a priority.

"I did not ask for the question to be deleted because "I felt that the discussion involved was important to you and the rest of IQ,"

Remember, I'm the one who did not want to partake & tried to delete my original A; but keep getting drawn back. Did you notice @Simon deleted my

(Dec 22 '13 at 15:50) ele

(3) answer as promised? I can't speak for other members; but my words on the subject were quite clear. I expressed more than once how I felt. The rules for deleting A's may have changed. It may not even be possible ~ but ~ if it still is an option ~ Not only do you need @Simon s permission to make this thread go away - you also need the permission of every person who posted on this thread. If you wanted this thread to disappear, it was your job to ask @Simon as well as all the other members to give permission to have their posts deleted. You've been a member longer than me. You know

(Dec 22 '13 at 15:54) ele

(4) how it works. I did my part. @Wade agreed. I guess you had bigger fish to fry. Now, I no longer care & the thread can stay. It may be of value to someone else someday. Poor Wade. As for entirely off topic ~ you need to get your story straight.

(Dec 22 '13 at 15:58) ele

oops ~ forgot edits don't go to inboxes.

Before anyone jumps to the conclusion, I was blaming you for flows suspension. I was NOT. bigger fish to fry ~ meant writing up your next ? on Meta & posting on that thread.

(Dec 22 '13 at 16:25) ele
showing 5 of 20 show all

@ele, I've now temporarily suspended your account on Inward Quest while this situation gets looked at. The comments you are making (and are continuing to make) appear to be causing considerable distress to another user of Inward Quest and I want to calm things a bit while we look at what has been posted and try to come to a resolution regarding this matter.

I've now also undeleted the answer you posted to this thread since, from your comment above, it seems it was intended for me, and others, through a public channel and I would like it here publicly to add some background to what is going on. I would appreciate it if you could leave it undeleted for now.


answered Nov 21 '13 at 01:53

Simon%20Templeton's gravatar image

Simon Templeton ♦♦

edited Nov 21 '13 at 01:59

I've noticed the comments from the user you are referring to. For whatever reason, she seems to have developed an unhealthy preoccupation with you.

The best thing you (and the other community members) can do about users like this is to not respond to her comments. Eventually, she should get bored and go away, when she realizes that she's no longer attracting any attention.


answered Nov 21 '13 at 01:28

Vesuvius's gravatar image


What you do not know is Jai & I have history. You never read everything & you jumped to this conclusion. Our relationship goes back to the date I first joined IQ & there are numerous chats between us.I don't need to prove anything to you. If you are curious click on my profile & then look at my oldest answers & you'll find everything I said is true. You claimed you were a moderator on another site. Look at Jai's answer to this question. That is an example of a very clever troll post. She KNOWS what she wrote is NOT true & was trying to incite me.

(Nov 25 '13 at 02:18) ele

Well, why does your "history" have to be so public? That's not the purpose of Inward Quest. Inward Quest is about sharing spiritual information, not airing your dirty laundry in public.

(Nov 25 '13 at 19:56) Vesuvius

History - another word with multiple meanings. Perhaps this convo & quote by @Grace will clarify my meaning. An IQ member thought I was a newbie due to my low karma. She thought my questions were being dismissed & I was being ignored.

Do I sense some rudeness to newbies. (24 Mar, 13:43)ndwigabn

2 @ndwigabn - Nice to see you. Not sure which other thread you mean, but I think that both @ele and @flowsurfer are far, far from being newbies. Both are very well versed in all things IQ, in my opinion. ;) I think you are just seeing bits of long, continuous conversations that are being (A)

(Nov 26 '13 at 02:46) ele

(B) interrupted for hours or days at a time by the "stuff" of daily life. :) (24 Mar, 14:51)Grace

History -- I was a newbie - I followed the lead of the highest karma members. Jai has no objections to chat as long as she is the one involved in it. I'm by no means one of the top comment makers on this forum & I make no apologies for comments I made. I've seen very little chat which is off topic. If off topic, it was usually humorous in nature. "YOUR "Dirty Laundry" I beg your pardon. MINE?

(Nov 26 '13 at 02:49) ele

(C) My personal history is not posted all over this forum. When someone posts the most intimate details of their life & asks for help, I take it personally. Many others do as well, especially new members. Jai posts family pictures & death notices & treats IQ likes it's her personal journal. I told Jai as well as others to stop posting personal identifying info earlier this year. Jai continues to do this. Jai's real name, DOB , place of birth along with the names of other family members have been posted numerous times & can be found quite easily. We know her mother's maiden name &

(Nov 26 '13 at 02:55) ele

(D) that's enough info to get a credit card in her name. I assume it would be fairly easy to find a home address via the internet. She's mentioned she's home alone at night while Wade works the night shift. Very dangerous. She claims she was attacked at home this yr while Wade was at work. Even if she didn't listen to me, perhaps others in the US did. I retain info I read on IQ. Not just Jai's - lots of members - especially ones whose posts I find interesting. I do not view this as abnormal & I think most members would be flattered. I also take any threat of legal action seriously no

(Nov 26 '13 at 03:02) ele

(E) matter how groundless. Simon did as well & I'm in total agreement with him. There are professional lurkers who do nothing other than sit at home & peruse sites such as this 1 for whatever nefarious reason. I think this message deserves repeating. Please correct me if I'm in error; but isn't META the place we are supposed to discuss this & not on IQ? How did you help Jai? Your accusations towards me are groundless & based on limited info. How did your encouragement & support help her or this situation? Do you also think its ok to threaten to take legal action against Simon or this site?

(Nov 26 '13 at 03:11) ele

@ele: I would give you the same advice I gave Jai: Ignore it. It's not your place or anyone else's to decide how Jai shares her personal information, and if you find that offensive, frankly that's your problem, not hers. It takes two to tango; the moment you disengage, this all stops. If you feel a personal obligation to notify someone of the dangers of posting TMI, feel free to do that. Once.

(Nov 26 '13 at 13:07) Vesuvius

@Vesuvius I guess I was not clear. I believe I only mentioned this to Jai Once I could be wrong; but I don't think so. I mentioned this here for the benefit of others - think of it as a public service announcement. There are many users here who did not grow up with the internet. Offense - none taken - now or before. I don't take offense easily. If I do, its because the person who spoke the words matters to me. There is also a dif between an offensive remark & a personal offense. Not my place -- says who? lol

(Nov 26 '13 at 15:25) ele
showing 5 of 9 show all

This situation is none of my business, and I've actually made a point to stay out of it though I've watched it unfold with some interest. Though it's not my place, just sharing my 2 bits as others have done here.

I feel this is no different than any other disagreement between a variety of other members in the past, even Stingray himself, though I strongly feel this scenario is being blown out of proportion in comparison. This isn't anything new, and can be handled as easily as any other occurrence was.

In my humble and unsolicited opinion it doesn't warrant intervention (from moderators, members, or otherwise) beyond a clear instruction to all parties to set appropriate boundaries so no more issues arise.

If I were asked the instruction I would suggest is simple. First, they no longer address one another directly, as in speaking "to" or "at" one another. Beyond this, they are allowed and encouraged to continue participation on questions or answers as they see fit, irrelevant of whether one or the other is involved in the discussion. What this implies should be pretty basic and straightforward, if you're going to have discourse then make sure it is not personal. We're all adults here, we should be able to easily reconcile differences like this even before considering the subject matter of IQ.

@Jai: You know I'm very fond of you, and what you have brought to IQ. So please understand I mean this in the nicest way possible, as it's something I've tried to hint at before but I'm afraid I wasn't being blunt enough. Toughen up, girl! You've been through so much, this should be a cake walk. This isn't the first time a user has made you feel unwelcome at IQ, and that is a problem.

Not that you are having a disagreement with someone or feel uncomfortable with what they say (Remember when Stingray caused this same feeling?). The problem is that this is making you feel so impacted it is discouraging you from wanting to participate in IQ, as it has in the past with other users. If you feel more or less engaged in participating here it should be for its own sake, because we all go through phases. No user should ever be able to make you feel pushed so easily, and I'm afraid it reflects an attitude which may be the same for you off of the internet as well.

Short of someone blatantly being egregiously abusive to the point where it's clear a moderator should intervene, nothing anyone says or does should be able to have such a strong influence on you. Not something like this, this is a normal dispute. Think more like the user 'Popi Bearcat' whatever when he lost it at me, this is approaching the kind of conduct I refer to.

Ele simply has different opinions than you. She hasn't been particularly affronting, or abrupt, not broken any rules. I have no investment in this situation Jai, but I will say I think this is becoming somewhat of a pattern for you and I don't think it's good for you. I believe maybe changes in patterns or behavior here will start to reflect offline as well, and I think this could be very beneficial for you. I hope you actually consider what I'm saying here as it's coming from a friend. Either way, love all parties involved in this situation and I value and appreciate each of your participation and presence on IQ, and I would be unhappy if any conflict like this were to interfere with anything.

Love & Light. ^_^y


answered Nov 21 '13 at 08:16

Snow's gravatar image


I tried to award you 15 more points but the feature is not working for me. I know your vision is not great & you prob need new spec's too. You need 30 points to bypass the Captchas on Meta. Used to be 50 but Simon reduced it to 30 for me . Maybe someone will vote you up.

(Nov 21 '13 at 21:03) ele

@Jai You should have voted up @Snow You know what it is like to have vision problems. Even tho we are close friends in RL now, he was on your side, not mine. Everything he said in his answer is true & he thinks the world of you. Based on the limited amt of info he read, he was of the opinion, I'm the one who deserved a warning. I disagree. We have discussed you often. He asked me to help you over and over again. He knows how busy I am & he said if the issue is time "give the time you spend with me to Jai, she needs your help." I really wanted too & yes, I could have fixed your (A)

(Nov 25 '13 at 01:57) ele

(B) issues with school. I don't take well to attacks, ultimatums, lies & backhanded apologies. I don't work that way. @Ursixx usually backs me up too. He's noticeably absent from this thread .. I'm not out to get you Jai. That is in your imagination.

(Nov 25 '13 at 02:01) ele

On the topic of imaginary ideas, ele, you're misquoting me once again and I don't appreciate it.

For the dozenth time, Ele, I actually directly disagreed with any action being taken against you singularly. I felt the only justifiable moderator action would be neutral at best. I also clearly stated I felt your account being suspended was quite obviously out of line.

I also repeatedly stated I tried to say as clearly as I could I wrote my input on this subject to be as neutral as I possibly could, avoiding any possible misinterpretation.

Do not speak for me, when speaking to me or others.

(Nov 25 '13 at 03:20) Snow

Without directly speaking out against any of the people in this conflict, I couldn't have been any more clear suggesting my opinion about this subject.

I do not believe there is any way anyone other than you could have so severely misinterpreted my stance, nor do I believe anyone but you here could have thought I was speaking against you. In case anyone spoke to the contrary, I assure you they're severely misunderstood to say the least.

In case it wasn't clear enough yet: I was not and explicitly made a point of not taking sides. Not on her side. Not on your side. My own side, if any.

(Nov 25 '13 at 03:25) Snow

@Snow Read what I wrote. You said I deserved a warning - NOT, a suspension. You said this to me in a personal email. NOT on META. We don't seem to speak the same language either. Your posts on META were very clear. I did not misread them. You stated I didn't deserve a suspension & you were NOT taking sides.

(Nov 25 '13 at 03:25) ele

@Snow I'm sorry, I obviously misquoted you. What I meant to say is @Jai "even tho snow & I are friends in rl, he didn't take my side. To be perfectly clear he didn't take any sides. He remained neutral other than what he said to me off line. My comment was actually intended to make you feel better. He gets really anal about stuff like this. Argh - so many drama queens here. I apologize Snow & I'll do my best to not miss quote or misspeak again . I'm also sorry that I totally forgot I was supposed to run any comments I made on IQ where you were mentioned past you first ....

(Nov 25 '13 at 05:07) ele

I didn't forget this time - I simply don't care. Like you said to Jai - toughen up! I'm not apologizing for the drama queen remark either Snow. If you have any more complaints - you have my email.

ETA I did it again -- dang - sorry , I changed it toughen up. I haven't refreshed the screen yet. Please read the ETA & save the lecture.

lol now I know why you want me to run my comments by you first... (haha)

I hope this is satisfactory. If I understood correctly you wanted a public apology for what I wrote on a public forum. I hope your happy cause I'ma lmao.

(Nov 25 '13 at 05:09) ele
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I feel like Camelot has fallen. I used to enjoy IQ but felt so recently like every time I came on I had to defend my Jai. It honestly felt like being on an episode of Perry Mason, "Everything you say can and will be used against you."

Jai noticed I haven't been the same since. When you see the one you love being damaged both in print and psychologically you see all your healing efforts unraveling before your eyes everyday I guess it is enough to drive you into depression.

When you nearly lose the one you love because she feels everyone must think she freak and liar that can't be believed or trusted, I it is enough to put you into depression.

When you see the one you love terrified she is being stalked by someone, it's enough to depress you.

Lastly when you feel that a place of love, light and awakening has turned to a place that doesn't feel very good to visit, it is enough to depress you.

Maybe this has nothing to do with any of us, maybe it is Satan attacking us for exposing his evil ways on earth.

I feel IQ is a place we helped build from the start has fallen. There is a spark of hope of the old me "All things pass in time. " However in print at any time in the future printed things can always be brought up against you.

I love Jai so much, that I can't be objective, I feel neither can Jai nor ele be objective in this. I leave this in the hands of our jury, the other members to judge.

Right now at least, I'm not in a good place of mood or feeling. :-(


answered Nov 22 '13 at 18:59

Wade%20Casaldi's gravatar image

Wade Casaldi

@Wade Casaldi in @ele case it seams so she now wants me to have a warning for telling her the truth? she probably wants to nail me to a cross for telling her the truth. yes many are seeking for saw dust in other people eyes and have a beam in their own eyes so they often see dust every where except at the right place.

(Nov 23 '13 at 00:06) whitetiger

@Vesuvius, @whitetiger and @Simon Templeton ♦ ♦

I have been gone from IQ a few days and felt it is not right to split without thanking all you.

Vesuvius thanks for seeing and understanding. whitetiger thanks for keeping Christian and trying to help. I know I could use a video or something from Jesus right now. Simon thanks for hearing us and calming things down. There is another user that just hurt Jai worse. To be judged in your fifties for a mistake in your teens just seems wrong but maybe that is just how I feel.

Anyway thanks, I'm out of here. I don't know for how long. Peace...

(Nov 24 '13 at 23:44) Wade Casaldi

"stalking" lol IQ is a stalker friendly site. Look at this question if you do not believe me.

Let me quote @ursixx "so much easier to stalk @ele ;) thanks Simon"

His comment received 3 up votes.

It sounds like you & Jai are trying to build a legal case. This is NOT a case of online stalking. Please stop trying to make a legal case out of it. You haven't got a shot. You can't sue IQ & you can't sue me. Good luck suing anyone for your cyber rep.

(Nov 25 '13 at 02:22) ele

"When you see the one you love terrified she is being stalked by someone,"

Did you think I was going to come out of your smart phone screen & attack her @Wade?

Wade -- Defend Her? Why did Jai need to be defended? Why couldn't she speak for herself? She didn't have any trouble constructing threatening posts or complaints. Take some responsibility Wade. YOU made everything worse. You escalated all of this. If you want to blame someone, start with yourself.

(Nov 25 '13 at 02:38) ele

What is wrong with you people? white tiger is as bad as Wade. Talk about drama queens. @white tiger - please. Nailing you to a cross? You really have a messiah complex don't you? It appears we are all speaking the same language - we're all using the same words - but its seems like no one can understand me. Look at my answer here

and @Wades comment underneath. If you click on edit, you'll find my original answer.

I don't get it. @Wade you are constantly reading my posts wrong. I'm not saying or ( 1 )

(Nov 25 '13 at 02:52) ele

(2) implying any of those things. I don't hate Jai.. Your posts & accusations are full of venom, hatred & disgust Wade. I am so glad I am thousands of miles away from you. You are scary.

(Nov 25 '13 at 02:55) ele

@white tiger I saw what you did to poor @Fairy Princess. I saw you follow her from question to question until she finally exploded. You are doing the same thing to me; but I won't explode. She didn't know what else to do. She didn't know she could flag her own question & ask for help. She didn't know about the contact button at the bottom of every page. She didn't know about Meta. Had she been aware of these options she would never have turned my comment into a question - she would have went directly to meta & asked it there or told me to go to meta for help. No one extended a hand (X)

(Nov 25 '13 at 03:03) ele

(Y) to help her. Had I been online, I would have told her to stop & get off the computer. After it was all said & done -- you laughed at her @white tiger . That was uncalled for and disgusting. Yes, FP & I had disagreements also & if she's reading this I would like to say "I'm sorry, Fairy Princess & if I had to do it all over again, I would do it different."

(Nov 25 '13 at 03:08) ele

@ele you are still trying to sling mud around and you do not understand anything, you should start by looking at your self. I did nothing to @fairy princess I told her the truth. that is in the past anyway, and if I am bad for telling you the truth and helping you out. then what are you? if you are not even able to walk in your own shoe, how can you walk a mile in my shoe? how can you pick up your cross and follow me? you prefer to pick up stone that hurt your feet and cast them at me. you should have stay at the beginning you would have know the end and not taste death. I say it to you again-

(Nov 25 '13 at 09:32) whitetiger

it start from the inside. stop looking outside. for the cause of your problem, and know yourself clean the inside of the cup. and again you are making a example out of your self of what not to do. but since you do not want to hear because you think you are perfect. you will continue to blame me for your own mistake. and try to carry out your own little vendetta, to nail me to a cross, first start by carrying your own cross and solve your own inner division.

(Nov 25 '13 at 10:13) whitetiger

@ele what was Jesus nailed on the cross for? was it not for telling the truth? like I am doing now. why should I have a warning for telling you the truth and helping you? why do you say that I am as bad as @wade. why are you looking out rather then looking in? why are you seeking for saw dust in the eyes of @jai @ wade and me? take care of your beam in your own eyes.

(Nov 25 '13 at 19:02) whitetiger

Oh Steve, Bless your Heart. Thanks for looking after me. You & I have always gotten along; but what you said is not cool - period. Please do not make a comment like that to anyone on IQ again. Thanks.
Who do you suppose it was who threatened to take legal action against Simon & his house? Here's a hint - it wasn't me. That was a rhetorical question which means I do NOT expect an answer. No I do not want either of them banned & I will explain why I said what I did later nor do I want either one of them to leave. They are family & families have disagreements all the time..

(Nov 26 '13 at 03:47) ele

@ele to what comment are you referring to? and why are you again seeking to control someone else, start by controlling your self. as for the legal action I do not know what you are referring to. what I said is the truth if you cannot receive the truth why do you blame me or want to give me a warning? we are on a spiritual site a innerquest why are you trying to find problem outside of your self? should you not look with in? to solve disagreement tell the truth and stop looking for problem in other to praise yourself. blessed are the peacemakers and the pure of heart.

(Nov 26 '13 at 04:25) whitetiger
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@Simon Templeton- I have to reserve a detailed answer to you in regards to ele- I am presently in the ICCU Unit of Geisinger Bloomsburg Hospital in Bloomsburg, PA. I am a diabetic, and my blood sugar dropped dangerously low all day yesterday, and when it hit 44, Wade and I had to come here for help. I feel pretty sick. But I present to you the above posting by ele, which must have taken her hours to prepare. I feel that at a minimum, she is obsessed with trying to get me to see some truth or other.

Wade and I are very sad. We never meant for this to get so out of hand, but ele kept bringing up my questions, cross-questioning my logic just like I was on the witness stand being cross-examined. I know that I am too sensitive, but I did politely ask her to just drop everything and leave me alone, which just made her more determined to tear down my "logic". I will try to do more, but I am also scheduled for surgery December 4th. Wade, I think, has been harder hit. We both need time to heal and to think. Simon, if you go through all the postings in chronological order, you will see how ele was spending more and more time at this. The final straw for me was quoting me from another website a very personal posting of my (The Shadow Self Posting) and then, putting into block print, that I was hurting myself and "that is why my knee will not heal". Simon, my right knee has been healed since my knee replacement in May of 2011, which Wade was present for. I have been healed of this since then.

Thank you for at least bringing a little peace into my life at this difficult time for Wade and I. At present, I have a bad sinus infection which may explain the sugar drops. But also, I was pretty upset yesterday when I saw ele's posting of My Shadow Self. I am not sure what has gone on, but at least there is time to look into this. Thank you for at least putting a moratorium on this situation.

Blessings (as usual),

Jai AND Wade Casaldi

ADDENDUM November 22, 2013 Evening, E.S.T PLEASE READ!!!

@Simon Templeton- Simon, now that I am home from the hospital, and feeling a little better physically, I have prayed about this situation, and have decided, upon reflection, that I would like you to un-suspened @ele. I have one caveat, and it is this is it: I believe that what has really gotten out of hand is the comments area of the site. I believe that this is where the trouble started.

We all used to praise each other in the comments area, or make suggestions, add information and links to the postings. But suddenly, the Comments area has become a place for a chat-like atmosphere- joking, a bit of flirting, innuendos, etc., which I feel in the long run adds nothing to a site that is supposed to be a positive place, a place that exists for Good, AND PURELY INFORMATIONAL..

So what I ask, if @ele is us-suspended, is that not just she but everyone tone down their comments, and get back to praise and addition of ideas and exchanges of pure information. This should not be a place where we tear one another down. I was very wrong, @ele, to call you a Troll. I apologize. I am truly sorry. I am as guilty as anybody in this department- except for Wade, and a few other people. We have lost a few regular people- have you noticed? The tone of Inward Quest needs to get back to a more informational and clearly positive site.

I could go back to a few posts to demonstrate the "chat" stuff- but I do not think this will be necessary. @ele- I ask that you refrain from analyzing my posts, and doing it because you honestly believe you are helping me. You may actually be right as far as inconsistencies in my postings go, but I have made it clear many times that I am a damaged human trying to get well- trying to do better every day- but I goof up, I slide, and sometimes my alters post things that I later regret.

Simon, Jesus taught that one should turn the other cheek. I am willing to trust that @ele will stop her obsession with trying to get me to "see the light". I understand that she may be coming from a very clear place in her opinion. But, being as damaged as I have been, all ele has accomplished is to make me feel stalked and hurt and upset. I know that she has been hunting the Internet for info about me...and I think that is wrong. Posting one of my writings from another place was wrong. So if @ele agrees to move on with this, I think that the suspension should be lifted.

We can ALL can learn from this. We need to remember that this site is like Wikipedia for anything remotely spiritual or "of the other world." I think if we all work together, and stop goofing off, and get back to serious para-science, we'll all be the happier for it.

Simon, I am sorry for my part in this...I could use the defense that I have been very ill and definitely off my nut at one point (well, when your blood sugar swings back and forth from 44 to 298, you are bound to be a bit wonky!). But that is not fair. I, too, need to remember that this site is not for emotional sagas or for drama.

Will this satisfy everyone? @ele, will you agree to back down, and let me be me? In turn, I truly apologize for hurting you. I am sure i must have.

Simon, I hope this will make everyone satisfied, and makes something positive out of something negative. I posted a bit ago that I truly wanted to learn how to be a Peacemaker. Well, here's my offer of Peace. I hope it will put an end to what truly will seem very silly one day.

NOTE<?B>: Wade is a very special person. He is a truly positive and almost holy person. All of this hoo-rah has really upset him. Please forgive him for loving me so much that he has had to step out of his usual peaceful role.

With Hope and Peace,



answered Nov 21 '13 at 16:13

Jaianniah's gravatar image


edited Nov 22 '13 at 21:01

Not good enough Jai I want both you and wade suspended for your slanderous statements which are unfounded & which can not be substantiated by you or Wade.

(Nov 22 '13 at 21:42) ele

@ele is that your judgment, that @jai and @wade should be suspended for slanderous statement, are you not doing the same or even worse? then should you not be suspended as well?

(Nov 25 '13 at 10:18) whitetiger

@whitetiger Please just drop it. The war is over, both sides lost. Only Satan won. Both sides are hurt, feel misunderstood, and will never know the offline pains and results of those pains. We forgive and ask forgiveness. It is at the point where we thank our supporters and walk our separate ways.

(Nov 25 '13 at 13:17) Wade Casaldi

@wade casildi there is nothing to drop. I am telling the truth about the situation to help out so people do not make the same mistake, since none of those mistake and error none of this was my choice. I have nothing to drop. since @ele needs to judge and make a example of her self, let her judge she will be judge to the same measure. did I not say judge not and you shall not be judge. the choice rest in her hands and she will have no one else to blame then her self. since she like to cast stone and mud and is not able to put on her own shoe. if it may serve a lesson on judgment let it be.

(Nov 25 '13 at 13:49) whitetiger

@wade casildi you remember in the beginning what I have said about judging. am I the one judging on this very day? or do I let @ele judge her self? we are in simon house do you not think that simon would like to have is house at peace in truth? or in error and chaos? not by power or by might by my word alone. did I not say who is with out sin to cast the first stone? on this very day would you say that I am telling you the truth?

(Nov 25 '13 at 13:54) whitetiger

@Wade I don't know Satan; but I sure feel bad for the fella. Always getting blamed for something someone else did. Hey, that could be Jai's next question on IQ. "Why do "Christians" blame "Satan"? (deadly serious - no sarcasm implied) You seem to be implying I am evil or have evil inside me or am somehow being controlled by this being you call "Satan". That's your belief, not mine. The only war going on was in your own mind & the mind of Jai.. Not mine. Again those are your beliefs, not mine. I don't want either one of you to leave.

(Nov 26 '13 at 03:44) ele

Why am I continuing on? Because I never responded. Too busy with RL & responding to everyone else. WT asked if I wanted you banned. NO. The only reason I said that is because I was shocked by your answer as well as Wades. Then I saw the tags for first time "trolls" & "hazing" & I knew what you were up to. @Jai Talk to an attorney, you have no civil or criminal case against IQ, Simon or me. Yes @Jai , it took me nearly an hour to compile the info because I was very very tired. It's NOT hard to recall the truth if you're speaking the truth & your accustomed to being truthful. .

(Nov 26 '13 at 04:14) ele

I have to agree @Jai , it looks bad. Most of the threads are listed twice because I made comments & A at dif times. You know as well as I do, I posted on numerous other threads throughout that period of time. I know this may be a foreign concept to you; but I was trying to take responsibility for my actions. I didn't want to leave anything out. I own my words & my actions & I don't try to weasel out of anything or blame someone else or play the victim card. If I haven't made this point perfectly clear, please let me reiterate "Everything I said I can back up with fact & links if ...

(Nov 26 '13 at 04:17) ele

if ... necessary. You told me as well as others to look at those hub pages. Why? Was I really the only one who read them? Wade posted a link in June also. I bumped one of your ?'s last nite. You even mentioned how good my memory was. Recall the convo on Demi & telling me about your wedding plans for Christmas Eve back in early 2012? I'm not your enemy Jai. That would be you. How did I know you were going to be posting from a hospital bed. I must be psychic. I'm very familiar with diabetes & how important it is to manage your sugar levels well. I'm posting a link which you may find ..

(Nov 26 '13 at 04:33) ele

find ... helpful. It explains how you can manage your blood sugar levels & prevent an unnecessary hospital stay or trip to er. It's fairly easy to manipulate sugar levels through diet. Were you monitoring your glucose levels. Did you eat?

Sticks and Stones may break your bones; but words will never hurt you.

I don't want you to leave: but if you leave its on you, not me. IQ will NOT be the same w/o you. Like the Traveller said - we're all family here & you & Wade are a huge part of the IQ family.

(Nov 26 '13 at 04:44) ele

Families disagree & they also come & go. The IQ family is very loving. I honestly do not think its time for either you or Wade to leave. Your work is not done yet. I hope to see both you & Wade back after Thanksgiving if not before. Your posts are hugely popular & it would be a great loss to IQ if you or Wade left permanently. I'm truly sorry it turned out this way. I'm letting it go & I hope both of you can too.

(Nov 26 '13 at 05:25) ele
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Answer removed, I was wrong about ele. I misunderstood her intentions. I am truly sorry ele.


answered Nov 20 '13 at 13:46

Wade%20Casaldi's gravatar image

Wade Casaldi

edited Nov 27 '13 at 08:05

Edits don't come to our in boxes. This was NOT your only Answer on this thread; however ~ Thank you for this. Next time make a new comment if you want me to see it. Now, it no longer matters to me.

(Dec 22 '13 at 16:10) ele

I'm truly sorry too @Wade

(Dec 22 '13 at 16:14) ele
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